Monday, October 24, 2016

Down the memory lane…

Down the memory lane I have had beautiful friends around me who were solely responsible for the eidetic memory I have. The memories have been shedding gladness over the past.  I thought I would recollect my beautiful memories during my school days so that people can match it with all those you had in your lives.

This brought to mind an aspect of culture which I’ve experienced in Haflong. The culture brought about by rivalry.

I think it is safe to say that most schools have a rival. A school that is similar in terms of sports teams, or reach for the top competitors, or school size, or even just geographic area. Any time the rival schools compete, students come out in droves, dressed in uniform chanting school cheers. It brought the school together, with everyone hoping for the same outcome.

I grew up with this. The cheers still come to me readily 16 years after I passed out from St Agnes’. I remember full-school spirit days, travelling to rival schools or Cultural Institute Hall for contests or simply as part of a cheer squad to support St Agnes’. Every teacher and student got geared up for these meetings and made up part of who were we.

Why was our school better than our rival? It wasn't, necessarily, but we found reasons to be the better school, and we rallied around those reasons. There are only five schools in the league . Don Bosco High School, Govt Girls’ High School, CHT Synod, Govt Boys’ High School. Geographically, the nearest rival school was about 10 minutes .The next closest school, Govt Girls High School was about 20 minutes away, and the next one CHT Synod another 20 minutes, and Govt Boys High School about 30 minutes. We all had school spirit. And don’t get me wrong, we never lacked those regular interactions with a similar school to really get that rivalry going. We had created a good old-fashioned rivalry (and a healthy one, at that).  We were encouraged to foster friendly competition; with a hint of "can't wait until we face off against you again"

I realize that this isn't the only thing necessary to bring an entire school together in an over-arching demonstration of its culture. On Republic Day or Independence Day we would throng in the Roman Field and just glare at Don Bosco boys for no reason at all. The boys amused themselves by waiting for the girls to come out of the school wearing their 4 inches below the knee blue skirt and giggling. And of course, they loved whistling at us. It was just a boy thing I guess. And the girls felt good about themselves. St Agnes’ girls were prettier and daintier than the girls of Govt Girls High School or CHT Synod. 

The friendship formed during those years lasted until today. And I’m sure many school mates would agree that friendship formed in school is the best kind of friendship we will ever have in life.

We can still joke and nostalgically reminisce over high school sports tournament, inter school competitions, friends, secret slam book, making notes at Miss Bonner’s tuitions, and an overall celebration for the school years. I couldn't have imagined a more perfect school experience than at Haflong. And to show how much our little town understands and appreciates tradition and values.

Sunday, September 4, 2016

Hello darling...

What we have, we don't want. What we want, we don't know. In the search for what we want we begin a journey....a journey of experiments with self and with people that come along. It almost becomes a cycle of hope and disappointments, till we accept this as a part of life. Then nothing matters but the journey, and the realization that you got to walk alone...make companions as we cross roads on the way....walk together, share laughter, till roads become different again. Some walk small, some walk the end everything ends.

Fun is not in length, but in depth. But in search of length we forget to enjoy the depth.

Monday, August 29, 2016

We have the right to choose to make it the best thing that's happened to us or the worst. The ending of any relationship, is the opportunity for us to take back the power and energy and effort we gave others to make us happy.

Choose to be vulnerable because it's ok and it's a part of who we are.

We can't forgive others because we can forgive ourselves first.

Friday, April 8, 2016

An Impromptu Trip

I was exhausted. Emotions had built up in the last few months. As more and more time passed, I had less and less idea of where I was standing. But I was 90% certain that that I could stand on my own two feet, and stop relying on someone else for my happiness.
So, I packed my bag and headed to Goa to experience the new way of being that I hadn’t felt in some time. I saw the boats, wild flowers, puppies, a cat, got soaked in ocean, walked along the shore leaving footprints on sandy trails, watched orange sunset and lay on the beach bed in the night counting my blessings and embracing life and heartbreak. It is through our lowest points in life, where we gain wisdom. Without loss, we wouldn’t appreciate what we have, without grief we wouldn’t appreciate love.
I was so immersed in my surroundings. The time spent alone forced me to reflect on my life, my recent experiences and the direction things are headed. Some of the thoughts weren’t pleasant, but I’m stronger because of them. The distance made me appreciate people in my life, it was self-revealing and exhilarating. That being said, love always finds us, not when we are looking for it, but when we truly need it. 


Monday, February 8, 2016


Am I jumping to conclusions too quickly? Have I made myself clear about my needs to him? Have I been unfairly expectant of them to just understand on their own? Or am I just trying to run away? Am I trying to justify my baseless excuses to get out of this? Have I done everything in my power to save this relationship? Have I taken note of what he is doing to save us?Are my fears concerning us even realistic? Are my issues solvable? Has all this happened before? Am I repeating my mistakes all over again?Is someone influencing my views on our relationship?Am I being true to myself? What was the reason I fell for him in the first place? Is it still a valid reason to be with him? Why am I in it in the first place? Do I see a long term potential in us? Does it really matter? Do we have trust issues? Do I love him? Even a little bit?Do I want to break away from this  person and destroy every link that we put to keep us together? Do I pretend that it never existed. 

Sometimes, it can be quite a struggle convincing myself that my fleeting heart is happy. 

Thank you Storypick.

Sunday, November 29, 2015

Lately I've been going on long walks. It's so magical. Walking has become my connection with the universe. I feel energized, inspired, relaxed and at peace.

It's like stepping and surrendering to the universe to allow things to unfold as they will. I needed that approach after my last unrewarding stint at CoCubes where I was guilty of spending too much time focusing on building a successful business trying to reach a type of success just for the sake of reaching it. But here's a shift in energy, because I am stepping up in a bigger way. Am I willing to do what it takes to make the difference? Am I ready to play the game for real? Well, I'm learning to say yes and no appropriately.

That means things need to get a little messy and unsteady first. That some things need to fall apart and burn to the ground to make space for what's next. And I'm willing, wholeheartedly committed, to walk through whatever is asked of me next.

Lovingly Yours,

Tuesday, July 28, 2015

I was doing really well with the whole 'being indifferent' thing.  Then for some reason, I’m hit by mild insomnia and mood swing and started on this really bad track and wanting things to be different.

I keep telling myself this in hopes that at some point it will eventually sink in, and I will finally, fully and completely realize that twin flames aren't meant to be together. And these are countered with the thoughts of how it all just doesn’t add up. It's the little things that I'm remembering that's making me mushy.

Let what is meant to be, be.

Down the memory lane…

Down the memory lane I have had beautiful friends around me who were solely responsible for the eidetic memory I have. The memories have be...