So many years have passed since I started this blog and in that time I have matured and encountered so many more life experiences. I am focusing on the basic theory of Wabi-sabi where we focus on finding beauty in the imperfections of life and accepting that everything is constantly changing. The basic work of living, rest and activity are determined by the sun, universe, changing seasons and not consumerism. I lie down when I am tired, eat when I am hungry. I talk to friends and laugh when something is really funny. I pour them a drink and we celebrate accomplishments. I have surrounded myself with people who support my spirit, nurture plants, by people who grow food. There is so much beauty and grace in simple living, creativity and art. I’ve been feeling exceptionally good. Not that I haven’t had a rough day here or there, but in general, I’m in a good place. And through all the rough times, I have come to realize that happiness is not tied to external circumstances. We’ve all been in that place where things feel difficult to manage, so we resort to quick fixes like alcohol and addictive foods, or find fleeting moments of happiness from impulsive shopping, Tinder chats or dates without truly cultivating a loving experiencing for ourselves, and not caring about what other possibilities might exist.
I tried recalling my 10 happy moments in the last few years.
1. Every time Arun gave me a beautiful haircut.
2. Whenever I saw Zed relish rawhide.
3. The day Max was adopted in his forever home.
4. Naveen’s surprise visits.
5. That moment when weight machine digits flashed 56 kg as I stood there.
6. The road trip to Uttarakhand.
7. Dance party with Owes, Kim and Bhu.
8. Reconnecting with Manoj
9. Sudeep’s wedding with Meeta
10. Discovering Tashi Delek
Swift fleeting moments of happiness.I am grateful for all the days knowing that none of the moments will return besides the rawhide happiness and weight loss. It can be challenging for the mind to shift from melancholic feelings when you think about dead relationships, burnt bridges and lost connections. We’ve stopped talking, dancing and cooking together. And through all the heaviness, we take care of this life we’ve been granted. Perhaps this piece of gloomy reminiscence only makes us more appreciative of the simple experiences and involvements giving us better insights of life and friendship.
I have parted from some relationships and I feel generally more upbeat than before. I am not as angry as I once was. A huge landmark of healing process is not wanting to go back there by recognizing incompatibility and reflection on why the relationship failed. With time, I have understood that friendship is about genuinely loving someone and not circumstances encircling our lives. And came a point where my oldest friendship bubble burst. But by saying no to relationships that didn’t serve me, I made room for relationships that do.
Happiness is a state of being. In the end, it’s all ok. It is no longer about favors, dance or joy as I begin to cultivate inner peace. I have let go of people who couldn’t appreciate me, and I’m okay not talking to them or not having them around anymore. I have trained myself to let go of things that no longer matter, and created a significant space for things that matter.
Live in truth,